Isnin 17 Jan den telefon Epit minta dia email salinan kad pengenalan dia sebab den nak buat visa umrah. Confirm dah flight umrah den ngan Ayong pada 11 Mac nanti. Sebab den pergi berdua ngan Ayong je, kena ada kebenaran dan dokumen waris.
Memula Epit silap faham ingatkan den nak bawak dia gi umrah sebab asalnya bila den cadang nak bawak Ma dan Baba gi umrah [nak bawak gi haji mungkin tak sempat dah sebab Baba kurang sihat], den minta Epit ikut untuk bantu Baba kat sana. Tapi Baba menolak untuk pergi atas sebab kesihatan. Jadi den pergi ngan Ayong je lah.
Kemudian Epit bagitau yang dia bercadang nak bertunang pada tarikh den pergi umrah. Kena ubah tarikh ... his. Memandangkan dia bercadang untuk kawin pada cuti sekolah bulan Jun nanti dan pihak perempuan perlu masa sekurang kurangnya 3 bulan untuk menempah dewan jadi kena bertunang cepat.
Maknanya den kena pergi meminang.
Sabtu 30 Jan je tarikh yang available. Less than one week to put together a 'rombongan meminang'. Epit said all 'hantaran' are ready.
Den telefon adik beradik bagi tau Epit nak bertunang. Semua available hari Sabtu. Sis Ha offered to cook lunch for the rombongan. Told Epit to have all hantaran ready at the girl's place but Ayong disagreed saying nanti rombongan sampai togel.
Epit arrived home with all barang hantaran including a 'gubahan kain'. I dubbed it ayam mati sebab ekor dia terkulai. Ended up redoing it so as to have the ekor tegak ... hahaha!
Ma called on Friday saying ketua rombongan [her youngest brother staying in Gombak married to a N9 lady] told us to ready sireh junjong and tepak sireh. And a 'cincin tanya'.
Jeng! jeng! jeng! ... jin mengarut start dohhh!
Tepak sireh is possible but sireh junjong is impossible at the last minute.
We were all puzzled with the cincin tanya but went to town and bought one.
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| Tepak Sireh [Cerana] |
None of us knew anything about getting the cerana ready for meminang. All I knew was daun sireh susun ikut saiz ... yang besar di bawah. Tak tahu pulak berapa helai perlu disusun atau bagaimana cara letak dalam cerana tu ... terlentang atau terbalik? Untuk nampak cantik dalam gambar, den letak susunan daun sireh tu terlentang.
Di rumah pihak perempuan, Pak Ngah ketua rombongan kami bagi salam dan hulur tepak sireh untuk memulakan peminangan. Everyone just looked on, nobody even touched it. Masa jumpa mak budak perempuan tu sebelum balik, dia ada sebut tepak sireh tu sekadar lambang dan tidak membawa sebarang makna. Den angguk angguk saja walaupun tak faham apa apa.
Masa balik, kami hanya bawak balik cerana. Hantaran semua tinggal sebab fikirkan ada yang nak bergambar.
Dah balik di rumah sis Ha, she said kalau cerana dipulangkan dengan sireh 'terlentang' maksudnya pinangan ditolak. Kalau pinangan diterima, sireh diletak 'terbalik'. Hmm .. I NEVER knew that!
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| Cincin Tanya dan Cincin Tunang |
Lepas bagi salam dan hulur cerana, Pak Ngah hulur pulak dulang yang ada dua cincin untuk tujuan 'bertanya' dan seterusnya meminang. Wakil pihak perempuan terima pinangan dan pulangkan dulang.
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| Hantaran |
Kemudian Pak Ngah mengisyaratkan pula 5 dulang yang kami bawa sebagai hantaran meminang, pihak perempuan balas dengan 7 dulang.
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| Sarong cincin |
Lepas tu den sarong cincin ke jari bakal menantu. Memula sarong cincin tanya di jari manis tangan kiri. Kemudian sarong cincin tunang di jari manis tangan kanan.
Selesai sarong cincin, we had tea. Rombongan mokcikool bertolak balik. Mokcikool kena tunggu Epit bergambar kenangan.
Mokcikool kena duduk atas kerusi sebab sakit lutut.
Sampai balik kat rumah sis Ha di Kajang, we talked about the cincin tanya. i was rather confused about the rings. My brother in law who hailed from Kuala Pilah explained cincin tanya serves to ask the girl's family if she is available to be proposed to. For all purpose and intent, cincin tanya is not to be worn by the girl but returned to the proposer. I remembered the girl's rep did that - returned the cincin tanya.
Cincin tanya is used during merisik. It is usual for cincin tanya to double as cincin tanda. Cincin tanda serves as a caveat. Once a girl accept cincin tanda, no other man can propose to her. Usually cincin tanda is cincin belah rotan and can be considered as the engagement ring. Cincin tanya can be used as cincin tanda. If another rombongan - rombongan meminang goes to the girl's house bearing an engagement ring, then cincin tanda has to be returned unless it was agreed to let the girl keep the cincin tanda.
So, on hindsight, we didn't have to buy that cincin tanya. Epit bought a ring with precious stone as the engagement ring because he has given the girl a ring and she has worn it for some time. He planned to give her a bangle in place of cincin kawin.
When Pak Ngah asked us to get a cincin tanya, I could have just used any of my old cincin because I can expect it to be returned. And since our rombongan was not a rombongan merisik but a rombongan meminang, we only needed one engagement ring. I didn't have to sarongkan dua cincin. One ring should be enough for the job.
Well! Rezeki orang!
Selesai sarong cincin, we had tea. Rombongan mokcikool bertolak balik. Mokcikool kena tunggu Epit bergambar kenangan.
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| Epit & his new family |
Sampai balik kat rumah sis Ha di Kajang, we talked about the cincin tanya. i was rather confused about the rings. My brother in law who hailed from Kuala Pilah explained cincin tanya serves to ask the girl's family if she is available to be proposed to. For all purpose and intent, cincin tanya is not to be worn by the girl but returned to the proposer. I remembered the girl's rep did that - returned the cincin tanya.
Cincin tanya is used during merisik. It is usual for cincin tanya to double as cincin tanda. Cincin tanda serves as a caveat. Once a girl accept cincin tanda, no other man can propose to her. Usually cincin tanda is cincin belah rotan and can be considered as the engagement ring. Cincin tanya can be used as cincin tanda. If another rombongan - rombongan meminang goes to the girl's house bearing an engagement ring, then cincin tanda has to be returned unless it was agreed to let the girl keep the cincin tanda.
So, on hindsight, we didn't have to buy that cincin tanya. Epit bought a ring with precious stone as the engagement ring because he has given the girl a ring and she has worn it for some time. He planned to give her a bangle in place of cincin kawin.
When Pak Ngah asked us to get a cincin tanya, I could have just used any of my old cincin because I can expect it to be returned. And since our rombongan was not a rombongan merisik but a rombongan meminang, we only needed one engagement ring. I didn't have to sarongkan dua cincin. One ring should be enough for the job.
Well! Rezeki orang!
2 comments:
tu le media kita asik dok tayang pilem inggeris pasai kawin2 ni... sampai tatacara budaya kita tenggelam.... hishhhh, mokcik sher merunggut jerrr :P
truth be told ... i have to admit that if there is a show on tv about all this adat adat thingy ..i would just turn off ... tak berminat mengikuti. dah kena batang hidung sendiri gini baru perasan itu tak tahu ini tak tahu. bila dah selesai baru tau. hmmm....
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