Sunday, June 22, 2008

Kembara - First Wash

In the morning, Ayong excitedly get down to give her newly acquired dream car a not that much needed wash. For people in our economic class, I'd say it is the feeling of novelty of owning one's own car. More so in Ayong's case, it was a luxury we both never dreamed of achieving that soon. Much as it shamed me to admit, the method of acquisition is also rather stupid some might think. Compared to current interest on second hand car loan which in our case stands at 3.4% per annum, I made a personal loan at plus 5% interest.

I had to do it [not that Ayong put a pistol at my head]. She is not ‘eligible’ for a car loan just yet. She has to have at least three months pay slip before committing herself to the world of debt … L

I am praying very hard our present flip flop PM will not do further damage on the country's economy and Ayong will be able to arrange to finance the car herself soon. My back is breaking with all the loans on my head.

What Matters

Ayong came home after two weeks in Raub. She arrived after dusk. She didn't come home the first weekend because the landlord wanted to replace the broken ceiling fan. I drove over and spent the weekend at 'her' place [she has her own now ... I can't explain how I feel - sad and happy both at the same time].

Thursday the nineteenth was my birhday. Fortyeighth [hmm! not too glaring when spelled compared to written numbers ... hahaha]. Ayong bought my favourite Blueberry Cheese cake. [Nooo! We didn't finish the whole cake ... ;p]

As I was going through some old work, I found something I thought was lost to me forever. I have had to constantly reformat my computer due to virus attack. I saved my works on CDs. Due to carelessness on my part, some of the CDs became unreadable. I was dumb struck for the lost files and folders were collections of pictures, articles and pieces I found meaningful.

Just my luck, I found one I used as a dummy when learning to burn CD. I wish to share one of the saved piece here.

Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end. There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten will pass to someone else.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.

It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed. Your grudges, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear.

So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to do lists will expire.

The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.

It won't matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.

It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.

Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought but what you built, not what you got but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage, or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.

What will matter is not your memories but the memories that live in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.

It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice.

Michael J, HumourNetwork.com


This piece is dedicated to a very special friend who helped me see the rainbow after the rain. Thank you.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Erma Bombeck

A friend send Erma's inspirational poem "If I Had To Live My Life Over Again" to my inbox.

I wish to share the poem here.

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck
(Written after she found out she was dying from cancer)

If I had my life to live over,
I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner
even if the carpet was stained,
or the sofa faded
I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room
and worried much less about the dirt
when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen
to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose
before it melted in storage.
I would have sat on the lawn with my children
and not worried about the grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television
and more while watching life.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick
instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern
if I weren't there for the day.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical,
wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy,
I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously,
I would never have said,
'Later. Now go get washed up for dinner..'
There would have been more 'I love you's; more 'I'm sorry's.'
But mostly, given another shot at life,
I would seize every minute...
look at it and really see it ...
live it ... and never give it back.

I have the very same wish too [except that husband part - on that part, my wish would be ... I would have made sure my husband take up more responsibility]

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Kembara - my first

My girl got her job, her car and her lodging. Her reactions reminded me of my own when I first started out that final week of December 1981.

Then, my father got me a 'kampung' house to rent at RM80/month. It was a two roomed house on stilts in Kubang Bemban Pasir Mas. It belonged to the late mother of my sister-in-law. There was no pipe water. Water for cooking and bathing was drawn from the well using bucket tied to a long rope and collected in 'tempayans'.

There were spaces between the plank walls. I suspected some peeping toms at night. During the second week, as I was getting ready for work, I heard a soft knock on the wall. It was dawn and still very dark [I think TDM just announced that half hour time shift for Malaysia]. I thought the knock was that of a lizard hitting the insect it caught before swallowing it.

It was after 6 am and I had to walk almost 2 kilometres to my workplace. There was no bus or taxi service in that area, only trishaws. And trishaws that move at that hour were fully booked to sent school children to schools and 'tok peraihs' to the market.

As I opened the door and put out my shoes [I wore 3 inches stiletto then], I was surprised to see a two legged shape in the compound. It was still quite dark and it took me sometime to make out the shape. It turned out to be a person with his 'pelikat' turned up from his waist to cover the top part of his body leaving the waist down part exposed. And he was wanking.

I closed and locked the door quickly. He kept on knocking on the wall. My heart raced a thousand miles per hour. I was SCARED but it was getting lighter so I opened a window harshly, making as much noise as possible and shouted at the top of my lung, "celako nate nih! nok rasa nappar Cik Din mung tunggu situ! [damn b*****d! you just wait there for Cik Din's whack!].

Cik Din was my immediate neighbour and an 'orang gedebe' [village hero(?)] and a relative of my sister-in law.

He disappeared towards the back of the house. Soon after I saw a trishaw coming from the direction of his disappearance. I asked the trishaw man if he saw a boy in pelikat. He did and knew the boy's name - a private school student renting a house with his friends not very far from my house.

That evening I went to see Cik Din and told him what happened [the stain lasted on the sand a few days]. Cik Din promised to take care of the culprit. That was the last of it.

I hope my girl will not have to experience similar situation.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Kembara - home


My girl Ayong and I took a bus from Temerloh to KL. We arrived at Pekeliling bus stop. Next we took the monorail to KL Central. It was almost 4pm and we had not had anything to eat since morning. So we had KFC at KL Central. Ayong wanted to buy a china silk dress she saw on offer yesterday. We spent the hour shopping. I ended up buying two pairs of dress material. Ayong got hers.

After that, we boarded the commuter to Kajang station where we then took a taxi to the used car shop at Batu 12 Jln Cheras Sg Sekamat. It was raining very heavily.

At almost 7pm Ayong and I got into the Kembara and started our journey home. We had to fill in fuel before the journey. So as not to 'carry' unnecessary weight, I told Ayong to pump in rm50 worth of petrol. Then we went on our way to see Epit my son at UIA to show him the newly purchased Kembara which he helped to choose.

About a quarter past seven, I received an sms from a friend telling me about fuel price hike taking effect as of midnight. I decided to fill up the Kembara on the way home.

From Kajang to UIA in Gombak, all the petrol stations were swollen with cars which in some places, spilled onto the road causing massive traffic jams. We kept thinking of filling up at the next station ... to no avail for the queue was almost one kilometre long at ALL the stations.

O'well, just her luck to have the fuel price increase announced today.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Kembara

Tomorrow will be the fourth day I travel to KL to get a used car. My girl will start her first job on Monday in Raub. A car is now a necessity not a luxury or even a choice. It's a must. At first we considered getting a Kancil. However, after looking at the recommended car, we decided against it and the decision burned a hole in the purse. A small sum of deposit was paid when my daughter took it for a test drive earlier.

Actually, the decision was highly influenced by my boy who is beginning his third year in automotive engineering at UIA. Heh! With such a qualification, how can I not take heed of his opinion. He was rather offended when his sister didn't involve him from the beginning. The sister's rational was not to disturb him in his study. O'well! He missed one class yesterday and almost missed a quiz today going around looking at cars.

Finally, between the three of us, we settled for a 2003 1.3 EZ Kembara. Not an easy decision in the light of the coming fuel price hike for it is a permanent 4 wheeler. Other than the 'waste' of the 4wd capacity which has more good off-road [so said some of my friends who never had to wash their car twice in a day. I do], my girl and I were concentrating more on the condition of the car vis-a-vis the price. My boy saved his breath from convincing his mum and sis otherwise. He only gave his 'professional' views not his personal opinions. So, it falls on mum to make the decision which one to buy. Yayyy!!! My word is the order of the day!!!

As always, mum did it. And should there be any 'thing' arising from the decision later, it was mum's choice. Smart eh?

So tomorrow, my girl and I will take a bus to KL in the late afternoon and we'll be coming back with her Kembara.

A Kembara to help my first born take her first step into the world of working adults. Here's wishing you all the best my jewel. I hope the Kembara will ease your journey into the next level of life. I pray you will do better than I did and find your happiness. May God bless you my love.